Big step toward a healthier sexual relationship
When someone asks me for advice about sexual relations and what a healthy sexual relationship should look like, my first answer is “communicate.” Always. But communication is more than just listening, and honestly, a healthy sexual relationship is more than just talking. Six layers of foundation make up a healthy sexual relationship: responsibility, safety, honesty, support, cooperation, and trust.
- Responsibility
As adults we have to be responsible for ourselves, but when it comes to sexual relationships, sometimes we get silly. We feel too comfortable and find ourselves slipping into childish behavior. Anyone who has had a healthy sexual relationship knows what it means to admit mistakes and take responsibility for them. Taking responsibility for your actions, behavior, and values can avoid many arguments and arguments. Even if you don’t feel responsible for the argument, apologizing afterward can be a big step toward a healthier sexual relationship.
- Security
Feeling safe in a sexual relationship is an important part of a healthy sexual relationship. It’s not just about feeling safe, it’s also about knowing how to make your partner feel safe. You need to recognize and reject coercive or manipulative behavior. It’s also important to respect your partner’s personal space and give them that space when they need it. If an argument gets too heated, it’s wise to take a break and step away for a bit so everyone can calm down.
- Honesty
Honesty is third on this list, but it’s just as important as the first two. Honesty and open, truthful communication are the best and most stable foundation for a healthy sexual relationship. It’s important to be open and honest with your partner, even if it’s hard to talk about, the topic of conversation is uncomfortable, or the truth hurts.
- Support
Like honesty, support is just as important as the others on this list and is a very important foundation, and it’s best to set it early on. Support each other’s decisions and be understanding of your partner’s wants, needs, and mistakes. Encourage them when they fail or take on a project that seems too difficult. Give your partner a non-judgmental space to talk to you, and respect their opinion when they give you this non-judgmental space.
- Collaboration
This foundation is harder to build than others. When you ask someone to do something, your brain is programmed to expect it to be done, but some expectations can be unhealthy. Take the time to get to know each other and understand what you can and can’t expect from him. You also need to be willing to make decisions together as a team and compromise. This is a great way to resolve conflicts between you and your partner without giving either of you a win-win.
- Trust
And finally, there’s trust. Trust is a strong foundation for a sexual relationship. You have to take your partner at their word and learn to trust them when in doubt. If you suspect your partner is doing something out of character or untrustworthy, talk it through. There’s usually a simple explanation, and it’s often not the story you’ve told yourself. And if you’ve laid the other foundations solidly and securely, your partner will be more likely to be open to you when you confront them about it.
7Final Thoughts
Each of these fundamentals is important for a healthy sexual relationship. Think of it like a lasagna; it has different layers and if you take out one layer, the whole dish tastes totally different and not as delicious. Responsibility, safety, honesty, support, cooperation, and trust are the requirements for a good and healthy sexual relationship between you and your partner.
